Wednesday, September 24, 2014

The Top 10 #Clemsonings of the past 10 (+1) Years - 8. October 19, 2013 - # 5 Florida State 51, # 3 Clemson 14

Last Saturday's #Clemsoning inspired the re-starting of this blog so thank Clemson for that....but it also got me thinking, "Gee, I've been #blessed enough to witness tons and tons of #Clemsonings in the past decade or so.  What are the ten best #Clemsonings of the #Clemsonings?"  Well I made a list and checked it twice.  10-6 are being posted today.  5-1 will be posted later this week (or next week if I don't have the time/get writer's block/something comes up.)  Spoilers: # 1 Florida State 23, # 22 Clemson 17 (OT) is # 2.  That was a seriously epic #Clemsoning - and the best football #Clemsoning of the past 10(+1) years.  But it wasn't # 1 because # 1 was the continuation of something.......bigger.  You could even say it's something that even The Undertaker at Wrestlemania (before he got #CONQUERED) would be amazed at.  But that's for later this week - or next week.  Anyway, here's # 8.

  1. October 19, 2013 - # 5 Florida State 51, # 3 Clemson 14

(image from )

Some will probably say this is far, far too low on the list.  To those people, I say two things.  1) You CLEARLY don’t know your Clemsoning if you think that this is anywhere NEAR the top 5 and 2) Just keep on reading because there’s an even MORE hilarious #Clemsoning that involved Clemson completely and utterly embarrassing itself on its home field with a national spotlight on at # 6.

We all know what happened here.  This game got a full month and a half of hype after Clemson beat Georgia on its home field to kick off the season (for a change - stay tuned) and then two days later on Labor Day a precocious redshirt freshman named Jameis Winston basically pitched the football equivalent of a perfect game (or damn close to it) against Pitt.  I remember looking forward to October 19th for weeks.  I still worked Saturday nights at a job that didn’t pay me nearly enough to justify missing college football Saturdays but for this particular game, it worked out perfectly.  I’d stay off my phone the whole night, drive home, pop open an employee-discounted beer and watch a top 5 battle of unbeatens that doubled as a national championship elimination game.

I was drunk before kickoff.  Why?  Because ABC just HAD to show those stupid team buses circling the stadium like 18 times for no discernable reason, driving from Memorial Stadium in Clemson, SC all the way down to Memorial Stadium in Clemson, SC.  Then the Clemson players ended our long national nightmare by finally getting off the buses and doing their thing - touching the rock, running down the hill, you know the deal.

Then the game started.  A quick aside here: My second ever home game as a student at the University of Maryland was on September 13, 2007 against # 4 West Virginia.  Our quarterback - a massive failure named Jordan Steffy - fumbled on the first play and then two plays later, Pat White turned that turnover in to a 20 yard touchdown.  

I guess what I’m trying to say is that part of me had some horror flashbacks with how Clemson started this game - a Stanton Seckinger (what the hell kind of name is this?) fumble on the first play then Jameis going deep to Kelvin Benjamin for the opening touchdown 3 plays later - but I was mostly just laughing my ass off at Clemson starting arguably the biggest home game in its history pretty much the exact same way my turd school started its first ever home FBS game during my tenure as a student.  Except we at least ended up keeping it kinda sorta respectable.  We didn’t give up HALF A HUNDRED JESUS FREAKIN CHRIST HOW DO YOU LET THAT HAPPEN IN YOUR BIGGEST HOME GAME SINCE AT LEAST THE 80’S.  Clemson got Jameis’d, they got Kelvin Benjamin’d, they got Lamarcus Joyner’d, but most of all……….they got #Clemsoning’d.

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